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<h2>Town Flood Liberates Yeast Warriors</h2>
The Greasycake River leapt its banks and flooded the city's industrial area last night, causing havok in the warehouse district. Particulary hard-hit was the Tricky Stuff Imports Company, sole licensee for the domestic distribution of bio-yeast warriors, the new "smarter than you" food product. "There wasn't much we could do once those little buggers got mixed in with all that river muck. They're everywhere," said Johannsen J. Johannsen, the warehouse manager. 
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The yeasty warriors have been spotted in water glasses served in local restaurants, luxuriating in spa saunas, and in bedside denture cups. At this early stage, the health implications are unknown. 